I Struggle with Forward Motion

>> 8.17.2009

Life is like a bicycle. To keep your balance you have to keep moving.
- Albert Einstein
Today is the first day of my last semester of college.
What a trip.

My college experience has been less than average and I can't say that I will particularly miss it. I started out at a local university which the kids at my snobby, private prep school un-affectionately referred to as "13th grade." Although my grades had been good enough to go pretty much anywhere my little heart desired, my parents' hysterical laughter at my inquiry concerning funds left my choices limited. There was also this boy...

I took night classes and worked two jobs during the day. After about two semesters, I was feeling burned out... and old.. and tired of that boy. When the family I was working for decided to move to Chattanooga and asked if I would like to come along- I pounced.

I attended a local school for two semester and loved it. It was old and prestigious and had the college atmosphere I had always wished for. I started taking day classes and wearing sweaters- doing homework in coffee shops and eating in the cafeteria.... and felt like a real student. But paying out-of-state tuition began to take a toll. I had been receiving a scholarship at my previous school and the money was still sitting there... After watching my account go red for the 28th time that year, I knew what I had to do. But my life is Chattanooga was something I was not willing to give up- so I started commuting.

Then I did the unthinkable- I changed my major six months before graduating.

Apparently, I have been declaring that I was going to be a teacher since I was three years old. I don't actually ever remember this declaration but after hearing it for years... and years... and years... and years... declaring my major as ECE seemed like a no brainer. Well, at least until I started TOSS and realized that if I had to spend my life in a classroom I would probably end up slitting my wrists or punching a child or watching soap operas or.. something equally horrifying.

So I switched to English and suddenly my life was complete. Professors started handing me books and telling me I HAD to read them... and I HAD to give my opinion on them and how could I have possibly spent a minute of my college education doing anything but this?!

I am now 9 credit hours away from graduation. In December I will waddle across the stage and get my diploma. It seems surreal and if Liam were not joining us only a couple of weeks after (for some reason the saying, "There is no rest for the wicked" keeps coming to mind.) I am not entirely sure I would know what to do with myself.


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